7-08-repost-CHANGES-VERY UNCOMFORTABLE
I really hate when things change drastically. I still am in a spin from how much things are different since Joe died. So much so that I think I try to keep a lot of things the same.
The last few holidays have been a little weird, especially Thanksgiving when we went to Shawn's family's. Before Joe died we always were with my family. It was very difficult for me at first but then I guess it was OK. And then I found out that the anti-Jennie conference was going on at my sister's house and was thankful that I hadn't gone, but I missed my family desperately.
Christmas, New Years and Easter were better. My niece and nephews and stepson were here and we were able to do our usual little traditions and it was nice having that back.
Well, the 4th was really really weird. Ever since my oldest nephew was born we had always been together, the first couple years in different places and the last 7 years or so, we did pretty much the same thing. We would have a BBQ here with my niece and all my nephews, my sisters and brother and my mom and Joel even came up a few times. We'd have our BBQ, then go uup and watch the city fireworks (they rock) and then back to the house to set off fireworks here.
In the last year or so, there has been a divorce and some other strife and hurts within the family. My sister and her husband divorced and this was his year for 4th of July. My brother and his wife, well let's just say, have chosen not to communicate with me and assumptions and lies....anyway so they weren't comin, and minus another nephew. There are issues with my mom and I so they didn't come. Another sister was having computer problems and didn't feel that she could leave.
My sister that got divorced came up but it was really weird for her without her kids. Then my stepbrother and his sister and a friend came up. My stepbro was just in from the navy so that was exciting. Then my other stepsister came up after work later. My stepbrother was acting really weird which kinda made me sad, cuz we were typically close, he barely talked to me. Don't know what's up with that, but it just made things a little uncomfortable. It was also my stepson's mom's weekend so he wasn't here either.
But we did the BBQ thing, then played some video games outside, (that's a new tradition, outdoor video games) then we had to run buy fireworks cuz someone who shall remain nameless, my husband, didn't get fireworks earlier like I asked. So we did, got back just in time to hustle up to see the city fireworks.
The city fireworks were way different. Usually they would do the fireworks in a certain area and we would just kinda park wherever and sit our on the hill in front. Well this year there were thousands of people, and they did like directed parking in the field, right by the playground equipment and the fireworks were in a completely different place, I was really surprised how much it had grown in a year. There were so many cars that I ended up getting to 4-wheel drive up at the no road side of the park in Shawn's Focus. (It was fun) Then we got home and my stepsister was here, we went out and shot fireworks that we had and came in and played karaoke. I guess we coulda done it outside but it was gettin a little chilly. Then everybody went home and we pretty much went straight to bed.
I also noticed another one of those, I must be gettin old things. I love those strobe lights, they are a must have and ever since we were little we always danced while they were going cuz it looked cool, and when my niece and nephews were there, they would dance too. But this year, they were just almost too bright for me, lol, gettin old.
I was kind of in a daze all day yesterday cuz things had been so different than usual, but it turned out to be fun even though we were missing some of the crucial parts of why July 4th is so much fun. Now if we could put the old and the new together, that would totally rock.
All in all, I had family here and I'm getting closer to parts of my family that I've not been super close to and I love it. They've been there for me without condition and seem to really see that I might know what I'm doing with regards to my life and my son's. They don't judge me and they like to here the successes that we've had and are very interested and loving to Joey.
I hope everyone had a superfun and safe 4th of July, and I do mean everyone even those that chose not to be with us or couldn't be with us.
The most important thing is that Joey had a great day, he had been looking forward to the 4th for awhile and this was the first year he really knew what it meant and knew what was gonna happen and was so excited. He even thought it was funny when my dog chased the fireworks. Of course the dog only did it once, lol. I'm dreading the year he thinks he's big enough to light some off. I actually just lit my first fireworks ever this year. But I'll let him under supervision cuz I'm not going to hold him back from anything a typical child his age would do. So I'll just dred the boy growing up stuff like any other parent of a 7 year old boy. Eek!
Thanks to those of you that came and helped me still have family around on this holiday.
Luvs
The last few holidays have been a little weird, especially Thanksgiving when we went to Shawn's family's. Before Joe died we always were with my family. It was very difficult for me at first but then I guess it was OK. And then I found out that the anti-Jennie conference was going on at my sister's house and was thankful that I hadn't gone, but I missed my family desperately.
Christmas, New Years and Easter were better. My niece and nephews and stepson were here and we were able to do our usual little traditions and it was nice having that back.
Well, the 4th was really really weird. Ever since my oldest nephew was born we had always been together, the first couple years in different places and the last 7 years or so, we did pretty much the same thing. We would have a BBQ here with my niece and all my nephews, my sisters and brother and my mom and Joel even came up a few times. We'd have our BBQ, then go uup and watch the city fireworks (they rock) and then back to the house to set off fireworks here.
In the last year or so, there has been a divorce and some other strife and hurts within the family. My sister and her husband divorced and this was his year for 4th of July. My brother and his wife, well let's just say, have chosen not to communicate with me and assumptions and lies....anyway so they weren't comin, and minus another nephew. There are issues with my mom and I so they didn't come. Another sister was having computer problems and didn't feel that she could leave.
My sister that got divorced came up but it was really weird for her without her kids. Then my stepbrother and his sister and a friend came up. My stepbro was just in from the navy so that was exciting. Then my other stepsister came up after work later. My stepbrother was acting really weird which kinda made me sad, cuz we were typically close, he barely talked to me. Don't know what's up with that, but it just made things a little uncomfortable. It was also my stepson's mom's weekend so he wasn't here either.
But we did the BBQ thing, then played some video games outside, (that's a new tradition, outdoor video games) then we had to run buy fireworks cuz someone who shall remain nameless, my husband, didn't get fireworks earlier like I asked. So we did, got back just in time to hustle up to see the city fireworks.
The city fireworks were way different. Usually they would do the fireworks in a certain area and we would just kinda park wherever and sit our on the hill in front. Well this year there were thousands of people, and they did like directed parking in the field, right by the playground equipment and the fireworks were in a completely different place, I was really surprised how much it had grown in a year. There were so many cars that I ended up getting to 4-wheel drive up at the no road side of the park in Shawn's Focus. (It was fun) Then we got home and my stepsister was here, we went out and shot fireworks that we had and came in and played karaoke. I guess we coulda done it outside but it was gettin a little chilly. Then everybody went home and we pretty much went straight to bed.
I also noticed another one of those, I must be gettin old things. I love those strobe lights, they are a must have and ever since we were little we always danced while they were going cuz it looked cool, and when my niece and nephews were there, they would dance too. But this year, they were just almost too bright for me, lol, gettin old.
I was kind of in a daze all day yesterday cuz things had been so different than usual, but it turned out to be fun even though we were missing some of the crucial parts of why July 4th is so much fun. Now if we could put the old and the new together, that would totally rock.
All in all, I had family here and I'm getting closer to parts of my family that I've not been super close to and I love it. They've been there for me without condition and seem to really see that I might know what I'm doing with regards to my life and my son's. They don't judge me and they like to here the successes that we've had and are very interested and loving to Joey.
I hope everyone had a superfun and safe 4th of July, and I do mean everyone even those that chose not to be with us or couldn't be with us.
The most important thing is that Joey had a great day, he had been looking forward to the 4th for awhile and this was the first year he really knew what it meant and knew what was gonna happen and was so excited. He even thought it was funny when my dog chased the fireworks. Of course the dog only did it once, lol. I'm dreading the year he thinks he's big enough to light some off. I actually just lit my first fireworks ever this year. But I'll let him under supervision cuz I'm not going to hold him back from anything a typical child his age would do. So I'll just dred the boy growing up stuff like any other parent of a 7 year old boy. Eek!
Thanks to those of you that came and helped me still have family around on this holiday.
Luvs
posted by Jenboops @ 10:49 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home